Welcome back. In this lesson we are going to look a little more at what we want and the emotions attached to this.
So go back briefly to lesson 3 again, and to what you wrote about your ‘wants’ for the future, and the emotions these gave you.
What we are now really going to do is think more about the practicalities connected to these, and if they still give us the same emotions.
As an example, if you said, ‘I want to live a big house, with a beautiful garden, somewhere in the countryside…’ etc. etc. The question begging to be asked is, ‘Who is going to clean it?’ A cleaner? Okay. Are you going to have a full time gardener as well? You’ve got to have to pay for that; Are you happy with having a team of workers busying around and invading your privacy? Also, to have all this, you’ll need a fair bit of money. Are you going to be working long hours? Or are you going to win or inherit the money? If you’ve got all this money, are you going to get stressed out managing it. Do you feel comfortable paying so much tax?
Asking these questions, isn’t just to put a stick in the spokes, and rain on your parade, but… does your ‘want’ or wish list still give you the same positive emotions to it.
I remember years ago, my dream was always to have a big house with a garden, and a small mountain hut somewhere in the woods, so I could have parties with my friends, barbeques and sleep overs. Wonderful. But, the reality isn’t necessarily so great. The house has much higher running costs, and now the kids are older, it feels empty most of the time. The garden is a jungle!!
As for the mountain hut, every time I go there I have to spend the first couple of hours cleaning, our friends have been a couple of times, but … too many things to do. And, the roof needs fixing.
A much better idea is a small flat in the city, where I can go to concerts, restaurants and go to the mountains, rent a place when I feel like it.
So, lets now remodel our list of wants, to make us happy but concentrating more on the emotions we want to achieve rather than the materialistic or superficial.
Now do this!
1. At the top of your new page, write ‘My Real Wish List’,
2. Now write another list (max 7) of your wants and wishes, but concentrating on the ‘day after’ and the emotions you’ll have.
In the next lesson we will be starting to think about how you are going to achieve it!